Mood Rings

So, it turns out, I do my best thinking at like, two in the morning lol. Which almost sucks cause i'm starting school soon and wont be able to stay up so late. But I'll figure something out. But, to my post.

I've found out as of late that I'm kind of a "emotional" person. Almost bipolar in my opinion. I can almost completely deny company and companionship one minute and then long for the friends I've cast away. Its like Relient-K said, emotional people should all wear mood rings. Although, it wouldn't be just for the people I'm around to know how I'm feeling, it would be for myself aswell. Honestly, I'm so pathetic sometimes. I don't even know my own emotions for goodness sakes! I don't know what to do with myself sometimes. I was at a conference that focus on the family does for teens every year called the big dig. It focuses on apologetics. Well, to get to my point, I felt totally focused and ontop of my game DURING the conference. but then I went home and almost felt depressed. The worst part is that I dont even know why. I know that a good solution is prayer. I'm just SO BAD at remembering to pray. Its pathetic. lol.

I know that God knows why I act the way I do. But it seems that he doesn't want me in on the secret. It doesn't seem fair. Perhaps its God's way of showing that I'm not in control. I dont know. It could be that I'm putting to much on my plate between church and school prep. and trying to be a great friend all at the same time. I just dont know. What kills me more is that I seem to fail at the friendship part everyday. I'm such a bad friend sometimes. It seems like too much.

Imagine a large lense on a pair of gigantic glasses made out of a giant dinner plate. Each of those things seem like a Coarse of a dinner on the plate making it harder and harder to focus on the big picture. Its so hard for me to do God's work with the correct heart with all of these things piling up. I wish I could push all the things into my napkin and feed it to the dog. All I really want is to please the Lord. But to do that I need to do all these thing with the correct frame of mind. Oh wow. thats so much of a burdon AND(theres an and people!) a gift. All I really need to focus on through all of this is that God makes these things easy if I keep the correct frame of mind. I dont even need to worry about doing well in all these things. As long as I make sure I'm doing God's work, the rest will come naturally! Its such a fantastic system! I WILL do good if I make sure God is glorified! So I close with this, If I keep God's glory as my number one priority, I will do well no matter what the circumstances. Thank you God for this knowledge!

-T-Klop-

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